Temper Tantrums

toddler girlWhen my daughter was a toddler, she would stand next to me and scream until I picked her up. This went on until it was pointed out to me (I’m not the sharpest knife in the drawer) that she would continue to cry to be picked up until I stopped picking her up when she cried.

That’s pretty obvious except it wasn’t to this young father. So, with this new found realization, I quit picking her up when she cried. And boy did she cry. When she did, I’d sit down beside her and explain that I couldn’t pick her up while she was crying. That didn’t help. She would cry for a long time until she finally got to the point where she would quietly sob and catch her breath. Then I’d say “Oh good! You’re not crying now so I can pick you up.” Although it seemed like forever, it only took two days for her to realize she was no longer going to be picked up when she cried. She started asking nicely to be picked up – “Dad I want to hold you” – and we were both happier about the whole thing.

Kids are experts at getting what they want. They are also receptive to re-direction. So if your child tries to get her way by crying or having a temper tantrum, consider resisting the temptation to give in and help her learn how to get her way “nicely.”

2 Responses to “Temper Tantrums”

  1. Hasan Nimer Qasim January 25, 2014 at 1:25 pm #

    Oh very nice, your daughter is clever. Standing next to you and crying, this is fine as by asking only you to be hold or to be picked up, this means that she likes to explain you how much she loves you but by her crying and on another side likes to see your love, your picking her shows your love and this what she likes to see where after that feels happy and proud. Very nice.

    dr. Hasan

  2. Dr Randy April 21, 2014 at 7:47 pm #

    Yes. My son didn’t cry but he sure could yell for attention. Eventually we had to tell him that we could only hear and respond to an “inside voice.” It took a while but the habit died.

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